Is it just me? I know I often see things from a weird, oblique direction, but every day the federal government does something new that stuns me. I couldn’t make this stuff up, and that’s what I do for a living—make stuff up, I mean.

First, the feds claim not to have read a new law in Arizona, but they’re nonetheless considering bringing a federal civil-rights suit against the state on behalf of people who have entered the country illegally through the southern border of Arizona. The law (and I have read it) requires police who legally stop, detain, or arrest a person on suspicion of a violation or crime to ask for identification that shows nationality. The feds’ opposition to this implies that they do not wish to deport illegal aliens, even when they have violated the law.

And now, once these people have been detained, the feds are going to make sure they are treated like guests in a resort, according to the Houston Chronicle. Commercial detention centers where these people are housed for about one month while their deportation is processed will soon be required to provide not only open doors and unmonitored phone calls (hmm, think Al Qaeda), but also superior cuisine, computer training, workout classes, twelve-hour sleep-overs for “friends,” and more.

I recognize that these detention centers are for illegals who have not violated any laws other than the laws prohibiting undocumented entry into this country. But frankly anyone who enters this country illegally is escaping from dismal circumstances, and I feel very sorry for them, but they probably aren’t addicted to workouts and salad bars and are unlikely to feel deprived if the feds fail to provide these amenities during detention. However, a terrorist who is unlucky enough to be caught entering the country illegally and who has not yet committed the dirty deeds he has in mind will be treated to a one-month near-resort-quality experience.

Not to mention that our homeless people would surely appreciate a month living in such circumstances.

Sidebar: No one ever seems to understand that most illegal aliens are only coming to this country because of a hellish existence elsewhere. And no one ever seems to want to acknowledge that thousands of these people are actually being “trafficked” into this country (which is a euphemism for women and children being sold to someone in this country).

No, American citizens in prison are treated worse by the feds than illegal aliens. Citizen prisoners in this country aren’t usually able to receive gifts of books to read (even though prison authorities can censor the books). You can’t send a Bible to a prisoner who needs to come to terms with his crime. You can’t send a book of poetry to a prisoner. Many prisons permit only donations to the prison library, and some of those libraries accept books only from publishers, not from individuals.

Yes, I understand that a prisoner is deprived of his Constitutional rights, but surely reading isn’t a Constitutional right: it’s a human right, and it’s in the best interests of society to have prisoners reading instead of sitting in the dark, rotting, going crazier than they are.

Why don’t American prisons teach illiterate prisoners to read and then invite those of us who are free to send them books? Wouldn’t it better to release convicts at the end of their sentences with at least basic literacy skill?